Pray for My Son

[Naga_Fireball]

my son was sweet and cute today and nonviolent. We played a lot and he smiled and made various vocalizations.

But maybe halfway thru our visit, I noticed his bottom front teeth were slightly but significantly chipped.

After pondering for hours I'm thinking since it wasboth teeth and rounded Chips, a doorknob injury sounds most logical.

The staff did not tell me he had suffered an injury altho I was told he had allegedly tried to bolt thru front door.

Ofc I feel horrible for all involved but mostly for my son. I told the substitute supervisor that his teeth looked broken but had trouble getting him to open his mouth next to a stranger so soon after dental surgery.

The 27th of last month was his anesthesia... What are the chances of this and omg.........


I told my lawyer, the house social worker and the cps assigned caseworker JUST IN CASE.


Right? cry..... And on this week of month too

[Naga_Fireball]

Hey, a much needed update.
The group home did an outing to the local fairgrounds a week ago. The staff said my boy loved it there. He rode the merry go round and ate sweet and sour chicken and liked it.

That was such a nice thing they did for him. He helped push the strollers snd chairs too. I did not get to go although they invited me. Cry. Too busy moving wish I'd been able.

[Naga_Fireball]

Just so you guys know. I do have memory issues and a tendency to color the past. Group home isn't necessarily the most exciting life for my child.

But at least he goes to the dentist. They feed him proper meals. As far as i know there are no adults hitting him or calling him names. He bears more blame for his condition than is fair.

I was such a totally terrible mom. Even this thing with the teeth getting broken at group home -- he had dental issues before that just from not brushing enough... yes he needed anesthesia and that is scary to any mother who has lost a relative in recovery room. But just letting the teeth rot was not the damn answer....

The dentist tried to tell me how common rotten teeth are with asd kids but it did not take away the guilt of giving up.



Lol so depressed today.

[Fredkc]

Hi Naga; Meet my grandson, Forrest Kile.

Incredibly cute, when they're asleep, huh?

That was taken 2 yrs ago. Just happened to be the best one I had in my phone, I could use. And yes, he's autistic.

He's almost 9 now. He's been in school, 1/2 day, almost 3 years, now. My daughter is lucky in that, there is a pretty good special school within short driving distance. A very affectionate little guy. (gives great hugs) Also a complete chatterbox.

Up until he was six, he chattered away in his own language. It wasn't just "babble" because he used the same sounds for things. It just wasn't English. Since school, slowly but surely, he dropped his own language, and started using real words. Used his 1st complete sentence, about a year ago. Gettin' better all the time.

His school was very surprised at the kind of progress my daughter had made with Forrest. She has had to find her way through to the proper mix of, insisting that he meet the real world whenever possible, and the allowances you have to make for autism. She's had to do a lot of this on her own. But this is also why I often tell her that she is the bravest woman I know.

So, it's your turn:
Never forget that you are doing one of the bravest things that can be done in life. That, to meet that person, get their attention, and effectively communicate with them takes all your mind, and all your heart, with nearly every encounter.

Anyone 2nd guesses you, screw'em! You do enough of that yourself. Love does find the way for the rest of the journey. For everything they're not, autistics are, and remain magical souls, untainted by a lot of the stuff we all swim thru.

Best hopes for the two of you,
Fred

[Naga_Fireball]

Dear Fred, thank you so much for the encouragement.
I'm quite sad today. The social worker at his grouphome yesterday said school had gone badly again. The school psychologist (recent hire too ) insisted that Paul is ineducable... at least at their thoughtlessly remodeled ASD deathtrap of an elementary, Davis.

The social worker also emailed me to say, the potential group home in a larger Wa city on my end has *not decided whether they will take him*....

I'd only just updated Spiritwind in pm about being told we were going her way, and now we don't know if he will be allowed...

So sad and depressing.


If the court felt that i could do the job without great risk, it would be a better use of the energy to simply try to raise Paul myself than worry about state neglect.


If Donald Trump wins, he is very likely to change the laws governing childcare and the entitlements of kids with autism. He knows what it is like to run out money and not have a lot of help, I'd imagine.

On the same token as your daughter, Fred, there are also community measures to be taken to help our kids. Better school facilities, restoring our public parks, getting kids a 1on1 in school and giving Mom and Dad respite hours.

Autism is a huge military resource yet the way we are harvested is like picking handfuls of wild grain off the top of the bush... neither properly valued nor compensated.


Our kids suffer a Lot because of gmo, recombineering, wifi , fluoride, god knows what else..

Thank you all for the kind words.


Btw, your grandson is precious. He looks a heck of a lot like my son. .. same hair. They cut Paul's short so he can't pull it and he looks hilarious. Like a tiny soldier lol. He also does not seem to gain fat and im worried his chemistry is so different that they might be letting him be hungry too much.

Some of the articles criticizing darpa et al mentioned gmo soldiers who burn fat faster than normal human.

I wonder what happens to the brain with a metabolism like that

[Fredkc]

From context, it sounds like your son is a bit older than Forrest.
Growing into an adult body, puberty, and the maturing of musculature, are all things still ahead for my daughter.

A few years back, I did about a year working for a company called Cole Vocational Services, setting up a database for their patient tracking system. What that facility did was work with down's syndrome people, trying to mainstream them, so they could live independently, or in groups. Amazing the kinds of things you learn by being a fly on the wall.

Like autistic kids, down's folk are very wary of change. They get confused easily, and unless you can stay calm yourself, and get their attention, it can be trouble.

Small things, one's most people don't even notice, can suddenly upset them. When it happens, they can go into a life, or death, "fight or flight" thing complete with a full Adrenalin rush. Means they can easily pick up an adult, and throw them into a wall. To make matters worse, to the outsider, it looks like they suddenly turned violent for no apparent reason. And they don't understand it themselves.

One of the places I just heard about, and want my daughter to look into is CARD, Center For Autism & Related Disorders. I heard them talking about having worked out a method of treatment, and counseling. With it, they were saying they could "pull out" and mainstream almost anyone. You might look into them, and see if it's any kind of help.
Fred

[Naga_Fireball]

Thank you Fred. He's 8 & 1/2.

Social worker at the house (not our useless case worker but a lady retained by the group home) informed me that my son was suspended from school until Monday.

Something there is seriously pissing him off and it's not the group home.

It's that worthless middle of nowhere stashbox elementary school in college place.

They are not compliant with federal law re IDEA or FAPE

[Naga_Fireball]

Free Appropriate Public Education (FAPE) is an educational right of children with disabilities in the United States that is guaranteed by the Rehabilitation Act of 1973[1] and the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA). Under Section 504, FAPE is defined as “the provision of regular or special education and related aids and services that are designed to meet individual needs of handicapped persons as well as the needs of non-handicapped persons are met and based on adherence to procedural safeguards outlined in the law.” Under the IDEA, FAPE is defined as an educational program that is individualized to a specific child, designed to meet that child's unique needs, provides access to the general curriculum, meets the grade-level standards established by the state, and from which the child receives educational benefit.[2] The United States Department of Education issues regulations that define[3] and govern[4] the provision of FAPE.

To provide FAPE to a child with a disability, schools must provide students with an education, including specialized instruction and related services, that prepares the child for further education, employment, and independent living.[5]

[Naga_Fireball]

-he hardly ever goes outside. I have 2 hours twice a week and we (total 4 hours per week) spend as much as we can outside in the yard in back. My mom provided a water table toy and Paul likes that, a Lego table that can hold water, and he also likes the little playhouse and slide that the group home installed years ago.

- he is outgrowing the facility and non-verbal autism keeps him from saying that

- school is half day hell, first suspension was bus and the second was due to alleged behavior at school

- specialist brought in from tri cities said that the teachers aides are terribly trained , speaking too much spanish in special ed, and paul deals with over 4 difderent "paras", spec ed teachers aide (manhandlers)

- this school has a closet in special ed classroom and an office that has been turned into "workspace " for paul...


- he can hear all the noise from "normal classes" but never gets to use the cafeteria to my knowledge or leave his classroom, i dont even know if they are doing recess

- they dont let him play any sports although most of his talents are good for it

[Naga_Fireball]

In a few minutes my son is supposed to see a pediatrician. I'm the only one who will be there to argue against medication again.