Reflections by the moonlight

[Moonlight]

Your friend is one of the lucky ones, IMO. To decide it is time and just let go is a blessing. I am happy for him.

The way I see it, life in a nursing home is often not a life at all. Some are alive because they breathe and their heart still pumps, but they are dead inside. This kind of life scares me more than death.

Some people have such beautiful deaths that it makes one wonder why so many people are afraid to die. But then there are others that make the process of dying very long and painful. Is it because they do not let go, are afraid, or just the way it is? For a nurse friend, the death process is the same as a birth. You know when the labor starts but you don't know when the birth/death will occur.

I was graced by my grandmother who is the first person I saw die. It was so peaceful and beautiful. I will always be grateful to her for this gift. While volunteering in a palliative home for a couple of years, I saw the beauty and the ugliness of death. Some say we die as we lived. I intend my death to be peaceful. i have to say that the dying have showed me how to live. Life is so short, don't sweat the small stuff. Go forth and be happy, no matter what.

[Fred Steeves]

How perfect is that...

[Moonlight]

It is thanksgiving weekend in my part of the world. I take this opportunity to thank you all for this space where I feel at home.

I am not too well these days, the autumn blues probably. I have a hard time making sense of this life. I even spent time thinking of how many people would be at my funeral.... I am not dying, well yes I am, as we all are... and I'm not suicidal, no worry ! ... I wonder. Am I really making a difference? Does it really matter? As it would be, the messages I receive tell me that I am valuable, and this makes me cry. I am loved and I love. That must be it. Everything else is not important, I guess.

Nature has changed it's wardrobe, getting ready to shed the life that was brought forth during the spring and summer. It always brings a certain nostalgia.

[youtube]https://youtu.be/B3chRntnMRw[/youtube]

[Christine]

Moonlight ... your questions and the feeling of blues have been shared by many of us. My resounding answer is that we are making a difference, a big one too! In spite of the circus of politics and the deceptions that more and more are waking to our consciousness is changing the outer realms. And thank YOU for your giving.

[Spiritwind]

I haven't spent time thinking about how many people would be at my funeral (maybe celebration of life where people tell funny stories and laugh a lot hopefully), but I do think inordinately about death and dying. I also think about the birthing experience, and how in a way they are similar. Both can be very traumatic, but they don't have to be.

But I also wonder about and have a hard time making sense of this life. Fall is probably one of my favorite times of year, except the pressure my husband and I feel to hurry up and get things done. The changing colors, the briskness of the morning air, the feeling of turning inward as all of nature prepares for the cold dark days ahead. I always think of fall as the time to begin working with the seed thoughts of tomorrow, as I stretch my imagination, energizing what I wish to manifest next year. It is interesting to think about how gardening isn't just about working the soil and planting the physical seeds. It all starts in the mind.

I think about those who seem to want to manifest a continuous winter, where death prevails, and what is born from it does not offer the same opportunities for us to explore the natural world (I'm suddenly thinking of Blue Rising and Narnia!). It is quite pernicious, and ugly too. I worry sometimes that I am just here to be a witness to it all, for I, too, often wonder whether I am doing enough with what I have and know.

But it's more than just what we do, it's also what we each of us carry in our hearts, and whether the energy of love for life prevails. That's our biggest weapon, IMO. For our connection to the natural world, nurturing, tenderness, caring, and so on lives in our hearts. Now I'm thinking of a Midnight Oil song, haha (We carry in our hearts the true country, and that cannot be broken, we follow in the steps of our ancestry, and that cannot be stolen...).

Anyway, just an encouraging word Moonlight, to also let you know your energy and your voice are appreciated here.

[Sandy Clark]

Gee Moonlight,

Your words are haunting and echo in my mind. Even with all the gratitude I feel I often think that my work here is done. I have thought about the dying process and wish to not linger or be dependent so I hope this is not a lesson for me upon the passage journey. In all honesty I have been fiercely independent sometimes to my detriment thus a lesson of leaning on others for my well being frightens me more than death itself. Too many let downs, broken promises, betrayals etc ..... My Mom had no signs of illness even and one night went in her sleep for heavens sake and my Dad a lingering Alzhiemer path. My younger Brother Bruce by suicide. 3 different ways of leaving so wonder what mine will be??

I am wondering about purpose and meaning a lot this past year. Is this part of the senior process and developmental stage, as even at my age, 70....there is still lesson potential happening and will continue until I/we transition.

Maybe the lesson at hand Moonlight is; we do not have to DO in order to be of value and just BEING is enough..... Hard one for me to assimilate and or integrate as most days I too feel pretty Blah about life in general, and again like YOU I am blessed to have family and friends to love and be loved by them as well.

Spiritwind, I do not desire a Funeral or envision who will attend my passing either. My friends are much on the same track as I and we do not have things we wished we would have said or done with each other and thus are okay with no ceremony for closure. I am blessed to have long and close friends throughout the years. I want family to do what will be appropriate for them to say goodbye and for closure and free me in the beauty and vastness of the Rocky Mountains. A family picnic celebration would be A Okay...... We did this for my Brother who passed 3 years ago Thanksgiving day and it was wonderful and fullfilling for all. He now can fish every day in his favorite lake and fishing spot, it is the one place Bruce found peace and happiness.

[Moonlight]

Thank you Sisters. I count three who would be at my funeral … hahaha ! I should say that a funeral for me is a celebration of life. A funeral is not for the dead, but for the living. A celebration of some kind is needed, IMO. Much to my daughter’s reluctance, we have discussed this many times so she knows what to do when I leave this ship. She is better with this now as she is growing older and having seen me work it through when my mom and dad passed, she knows it is important. She has asked me to make a list of the songs I would like at my celebration of life, one of which would be My Sweet Lord (George Harrison). I have not done so yet. You guys could play Moonlight Sonata (Beethoven) hahaha! I would also love them to have a glass of champagne. I have asked a good friend to do a certain ritual for my body, if allowed, as I do not know when and where I will leave. Because of who I Am, I have a reverence for death as I have for life. Both life and death travel together. We see that in nature every day.

I sometimes loose myself and then nothing makes sense anymore. It is easy to start navel gazing when this happens… boo hoo. Then I find that my navel needs a little cleaning and once cleaned, things get better. I then remember my song and why I came here, and continue my walk in beauty.

My favorite season is spring… so fall brings nostalgia. My body, as nature, wants to go within and though I can do this internally, outwardly I am asked, like most people I know, to continue on. I dread the coming mornings of freezing my ass at the bus stop in the winter. I have two jobs, one where I get the money required to pay the bills, the other is my heart’s calling. Caring for people is not valued in society so the pay is minimal when you care for people, but pushing paper pays well. Go figure! Last fall, I was at the point financially to let go of my love work because I was fucking broke! Then this pushing paper job came to me. I told them I could only work part-time and they said we’ll take what you can give. Am I ever blessed! So that job pays for the other. I have the best of both worlds, and yet I complain. Hahaha.

Yesterday morning, Mr. V. was not well at all. He does not sleep at night because he is afraid. I know he is afraid to die alone; most people caring for him cannot grasp this. As I held his hand while he found sleep, I was at peace and so was he. A couple of months ago, when Mrs. A. said she wanted to die, people caring for her said: don’t talk like that. I said: why is that? And I let her tell me her peace. My Being helps me do what I came here for.

This is why a safe place like EE is of value to me. Life out there does not make any sense. Sometimes, even your friends cannot listen to what you have to say. I can drop a WTF bomb here, and I am surrounded, not judged. Thank you.

[youtube]https://youtu.be/YiDpIaXQDrI[/youtube]

Edit: how can I forget ! Blue Rising has been called so ... Hi Blue !

[Sandy Clark]

Food For thought

The Trumaan Show

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[LostNFound]

Just to Paraphrase, "When this physical body is lay barren, eat of it that you may Grok my inner being that will only step across a barrier, only to continue to walk along a higher path." Valentine Michael Smith. This could be off base but as I remember this fictional Stranger did offer his physical form for food. Just so those that remain behind may truly understand the being, the essence of he that stepped forward and kept on moving.

I have the same thoughts about funerals as well as my Twin Flame. There will only be a party, a parting of ways of days gone by. She says play all the blues songs you know I like, order Pizza and throw a party but never morn, no need to cry, no need to be sad because I only stepped forward, so perhaps you can catch up when you step forward.

I say this, Take me to the forest and if I can still walk, let me go and leave for now. I am sure that Mother nature will make sure that this body is put to good use with the life in these woods. I will play my music and sing my songs and then....................

COME AND GONE

And so we come, we see the light, we feel the heart.
Something or someone gave us the connection of not being apart.
We talk of love, we talk of knowing, we feel the warmth and we see the dove.

We give of our life and fall into the memories as we speak of our stories.
Each of us knows the living of all the past
Yes we learn to know,
how we can grow, and how long we all may last.

A touch of sound, a memory from the mind, is something sad and something wonderful from behind.
Yet each of us has lost and each has gained and we all have tried to explain
That we are all the same in our quest to shed the blame, do we not feel the shame?
You and I we live in this illusion,
But we try so hard to find a solution.

And so we come to touch just some
And when we come we find it is all the same.
So you and I are but just one
And then we are gone.


The Wolf will speak to the Moonlight
as your spirit will take flight.

Steven

[Moonlight]

Hahaha.... The True-man Show... when I was a kid, i had the impression that everybody else knew something except myself, like i was in some kind of movie. When i saw the True-man show, it kinda blew my mind. Yes, food for thought.

That is beautiful Steven. Thank you.

The dead are food for the living... It was Stephen Jenkinson, alias Griefwalker, that first brought up this reflection in me. You may want to check him out if you haven't.

[youtube]https://youtu.be/d2IhwsTtXzA[/youtube]

Well... if I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening and good night !