Innerview with Howdie Mickoski | Exploring the Nature of Our Realm

Howdie had asked that we keep our recording to one hour and I wanted to honor this, though I don’t feel I was able to touch on some important points. Partially because I had not slept the night before with chills, body aches, and pains; I had considered cancelling but decided to go ahead, so I clearly wasn’t at my most lucid. I am most grateful for the opportunity to speak with Howdie—the following questions arise from an inner impulse to help clarify what I feel was either missing or only partially explained during our conversation. No single one of us has “the answer” and yet my deepest sense of Being tells me, that we do know the answers to a perplexing array of questions. Howdie says this too, in his own unique way—this knowing is Present if we can tap into the root vibration of Truth.

There is a great deal of focus on how to exit “the soul trap”, “the matrix”, “the cave” and yet we often forget to contemplate an answer to the following question: Where do we come from? Without a thorough examination of this, I feel we will be forever wandering in the desert, for to comprehend the nature of this realm requires that we Know our True Nature.

Some questions for Howdie and personal contemplation.

Using the robots in West World as an analogy is at best sketchy and in my opinion misdirects our attention when it comes to exiting the cave—can we just walk off the set into some unknown terrain? To allude to our human form as robotic disallows a truth that we are a divinely created body temple animated by consciousness. In our talk we mention The Secret Gospel of John, a coptic text from the Nag Hammadi library in which there is a detailed description of the Demiurge (Yaldabaoth) and the archonic rulers creating the body of Adam. Adam did not have the Divine Spark until The Most High tricked Yaldabaoth into breathing His Breath of Life into him. When they realized that Adam not only had received their powers but also the power of the Most High they became envious. By stating this, whether one believes the Gnostic account or not, it lets us know we are capable of the highest love and also the most base degeneracy. A question that remains to be asked and answered is; Who or what created the Deminurge? From my perspective, we are endowed with the ability to “choose”. This could be a chosen belief, ie. Christian, etc., or could be a mental choice such that Howdie has made, ie. everything in this creation has one purpose and that is to harvest our energy. Observationally speaking, it is obvious that the great onslaught is to keep us from discovering ourselves, so I am not in total disagreement. Where I diverge is that of choice to become Love and the underlaying Truth that I feel when I do. As John St. Julien so beautifully phrases it: Fall into the ever-loving heart of God. For myself, this supersedes and nullifies all attempts to divert the human heart into giving its energy to the control grid.

We are not simply programmed like robots to do the bidding of some evil master. This is a deep subject which I have written about it elsewhere.

A side caveat is that “predictive programming” has become an overused term that has fascinated and occupied many minds in analyzing a wide array of movies and shows. My question, and it is a question: Does this constant analysis become an energetic factor in these “shows” taking form in the world at large? Another phrase for predictive programming could easily be spell casting. There appears to be an interesting play between the state of our consciousness and the outward manifestations in this reality. When “reading” the field of consciousness that seems to be informing many thousands of us, I have noticed for many years how we all pick up on the same thought forms, almost simultaneously.

This brings me to another statement I feel that I need to underline: We are not victims; to say that we were tricked into being here, that we were promised something and didn’t receive it and therefore became trapped can easily cause one to become demoralized. What was that promise? He also states that we chose to fall into matter which contradicts the tricked and trapped narrative. Howdie expresses that we aren’t culpable because we were fooled. Observation tells us otherwise. For myself, maintaining any victim consciousness is how we weaken ourselves, for it puts the onerous on other-than-self, thereby giving the other power over us. I would also point out the difference between fault, blame, and shame. When I speak of victim consciousness, it doesn’t cast the blame or fault on anyone, though clearly many are complicit in the nefarious agenda, some consciously such as order followers who would maim and kill for their bosses, others unconsciously in an effort to survive in an increasingly difficult life situation.

Nothing that is manifesting in this density of Creation was made solely by the Archons, the best they can do, and have done, is convince people that the material rewards of money, fame, glory, or power is preferable to the rewards of Spirit, Love, and kindness. It is a choice we each have to make along the journey of our lives. Listen to and follow the ever-loving heart of god; to say we don’t have a choice is also disempowering, for it assumes we have no inner guidance that lets us know right from wrong. Speaking for myself, the day I accepted complete responsibility was the day I truly started a path to liberation.

It is true that we have limited perception and do not know the answers to some of the most existential questions and so we are left with following our deepest intuition and highest calling. I simply can not see the whole of this realm as evil and a trap; there is far too much beauty in the natural world—in the quietest foundational part of my what I call soul is a rejoicing to the caresses of the wind, the song of the birds, an eagle soaring overhead, the babbling of a pure stream of water, the purring of a cat and far too many other manifestations to mention. My joy is in measure to all the sorrow I have felt in this life; once this is integrated within, there is a narrow path that opens for the intrepid soul to follow. I don’t expect any guarantees and fully realize that as the way narrows, there comes a point when we have to let go of everything and thereby in love alone be lifted.

Memory wipes are never complete, while the mind can become clouded and deluded, the body retains memory. This proposition also assumes that memory is in the sole domain of the mind, that somehow our lives were lived linearly and therefore if we recalled our past errors we would correct them in a new life. Here is something to think about; even in a present life I have observed how few people learn from their mistakes and so continue to make them; there is a great deal of self sabotage that plays out again and again and often right up to the point of death. Many years ago I had a moment of birth recall session; during this session I felt my essence floating in a space observing the body I was to inhabit start down the birth canal, in an instant my soul downloaded everything that I was going to experience. It was so shocking that the body turned breech and had to be pulled from the womb with forceps. I had violently rebelled at the last minute but to no avail. Yes, the path to the present moment has been strewn with many obstacles along the way, yet I can now rejoice in all of my trials and joys.

On the word choice. We both agreed that words are not adequate in many ways when describing energy and the unseen realm. And even more inadequate when attempting to unveil how the matrix responds to us, our thoughts, emotions, activities, etc.. While I listened carefully to Howdie’s reasoning on why we don’t really have choice I found myself with a wholly different opinion. True, many people are locked into a mind pattern that says: “I want this, therefore if I do this, the outcome will be to my liking.” This obviously doesn’t work and at best is extremely limited by the construct as well self-limiting beliefs and subconscious patterns. Once again, we can take apart the falsity and hopium of many New Age beliefs. Putting that aside we still are constantly making choices, whether on something as mundane as what we will eat for dinner—to the more subtle choices of choosing a right or wrong response to any stimuli, we can’t get away from this fact. If we don’t acknowledge this as a divine inheritance, the act of free will, we might as well be robots.

I don’t think anyone can fully answer for another on how to exit The Cave. Again, I found myself diverging from Howdie’s assessment; he speaks about home being some where else, somewhere we can’t remember, yet we all have the Divine Spark within us, that when lit acts like a beacon back to our Spiritual home within. Anyone who has felt the Presence of The All will know, without doubt, of the uplifting of Spirit this imbues the human vessel with.

In summation: Howdie speaks of pursuing the Truth, and in this I find myself in total agreement with him. Without doubt there are multiple layers of traps laid to keep us away from Self knowledge. I will once again quote Neil Kramer’s definition of Truth, for without definition we could easily be speaking of Truths that are diametrically opposed to each other. Truth is that which corresponds to reality, as perceived by God. I will simply leave this description here on the page as words to contemplate.

Truth is not of this world, nor is awakening earned by knowledge alone, but by grace. As dark and compressing as the matrix of deception is, the simple act of being a light in the dark has profound effects that are often missed and under appreciated.

Postscript: Since I published the video there have been several comments as the subject definitely strikes a chord. I am listening to the words of others, I can empathize with them and yet hold a different perspective without issue or rancor. As life has so often provided me with inspiration from others’ words, I will share these ones now.

The absolute didn’t just create this world like a painter creates an artwork, however is still separated from his creation. That’s what religion teaches us. That God created us and is observing us from above and is watching over us. On the Mystic path we remember that God, the Beloved became the world. The infinite consciousness that resides outside of space and time and duality poured itself into time and space, wiping its own memory, shattering itself into the material world in order to experience itself. You are fragments of that Light. You are a perfect eternal being, all powerful and all knowing. You won’t try to escape this reality like a Gamer who speed-runs through a video game. You realize the interconnectedness of all beings and enjoy every second here. This life, with its myriad forms, light, joy, pain, sadness and suffering is a holy place. We’re always surrounded by Love’s endless revelation, the wind whispering the secrets of the Eternal Beloved, reminding us that all of creation is a living expression of divine oneness and that love is our essential nature. 
— author unknown

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